Bowling

I used to be a pretty decent bowler. I took a bowling class at BYU. Because the class is based on improvement, I was advised by many people to underperform the first few weeks of the semester. Not a problem. I didn't even have to try. My bowling ball had a real affinity for the gutters. However, by the time the semester ended I could usually bank on a few strikes every game, and once or twice I even managed a turkey. Not only that, but I developed a nice little left hook on my ball.

Those days are behind me. FAR behind me. I went bowling tonight with some people from the ward, to celebrate a friend's birthday. It was going along about as well as one would expect from someone who hasn't set foot in a bowling alley in at least six years. I felt like I was starting to warm up. I got up to take my turn, held the ball up in front of me, then swung it back...and suddenly my fingers were no longer in the ball. There was a very loud thunk behind me. I knew that my left hook would be long gone, but I had not anticipated chasing my bowling ball bouncing along in the wrong direction. Obviously I need to spend some more time at the lanes, but next time I go I think I need to skip doing my hair, pile on the bright blue eye shadow, and wear a halter top and super tight jeans with ripped out knees. That way I'll fit in a little better with the regulars. How is it that bowlers in California look just like the bowlers in Utah? It's like some kind of secret society.